Sunday, December 28, 2008

The difference between love, lust and marriage

Love: When your eyes meet across a crowded room.
Lust: When your tongues meet across a crowded room.
Marriage: When you try to lose your spouse in a crowded room.

Love: When intercourse is called "making love."'
Lust: When intercourse is called "screwing."
Marriage: When intercourse is a town in Pennsylvania.

Love: When you argue over how many children to have.
Lust: When you argue over who gets the wet spot.
Marriage: When you argue over whose idea it was to have kids.

Love: When you share everything you own.
Lust: When you steal everything they own.
Marriage: When the bank owns everything.

Love: When it doesn't matter if you don't climax.
Lust: When the relationship is over if you don't climax.
Marriage: When ... uh ... what's a climax?

Love: When you phone each other just to say, "Hi."
Lust: When you phone each other to pick a hotel room.
Marriage: When you phone each other to bitch about work.

Love: When you write poems about your partner.
Lust: When all you write is your phone number.
Marriage: When all you write is checks.

Love: When your only concern is for your partner's feelings.
Lust: When your only concern is to find a room with mirrors all around.
Marriage: When you're only concern is what's on TV.

Love: When you are proud to be seen in public with your partner.
Lust: When you only see each other naked.
Marriage: When you never see each other awake.

Love: When your heart flutters every time you see them.
Lust: When your groin twitches every time you see them.
Marriage: When your wallet empties every time you see them.

Love: When all the songs on the radio describe exactly how you feel.
Lust: When the song on the radio determines how you do it.
Marriage: When you listen to talk radio.

Love: When breaking up is something you try not to think about.
Lust: When staying together is something you try not to think about.
Marriage: When just getting through the day is your only thought.

Love: When you're only interested in doing things with your partner.
Lust: When you're only interested in doing things TO your partner.
Marriage: When you're only interested in your golf score.

Love: When a rainy day means more time to stay inside and talk.
Lust: When a rainy day means more time to stay inside and have sex.
Marriage: When a rainy day means it's time to clean the basement.

Love: You only leave the house to buy coffee and doughnuts.
Lust: You only leave the house to buy condoms and Vaseline.
Marriage: You only leave the house when you're allowed

Related posts:
10 signs that it's love
10 signs it's lust
Types of people to avoid for marriage


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