Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Celebrities' words of wisdom

Women might be able to fake orgasms, but men can fake entire relationships.
~ Sharon Stone

I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with "Guess" on it. I said, "Thyroid problem?"
~ Arnold Schwarzenegger

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.
~ Tiger Woods

And God said, "Let there be Satan, so people don't blame everything on me. And let there be lawyers, so people don't blame everything on Satan."
~ George Burns

My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son of a bitch.
~ Jack Nicholson

Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.
~ Billy Crystal

According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful.
~ Robert De Niro

In the last couple of weeks I have seen the ads for the Wonder Bra. Is that really a problem in this country - men not paying enough attention to women's breasts?
~ Hugh Grant

There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?
~ Dustin Hoffman

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.
~ Robin Williams

It's not easy being green.
~ Immortal words of the great American philosopher Kermit the Frog


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