Sunday, September 25, 2011

Things you don't want to hear during surgery

"Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy."
"Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness"
"Bo! Bo! Come back with that! Bad Dog!"
"Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?"
"Hand me that ... uh ... that uh..... thingie"
"Oh no! I just lost my Rolex."
"Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?"
"There goes the lights again..."
"Ya know, there's big money in kidneys.. and this guy's got two of'em."
"Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!"
"Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing my concentration off."
"What's this doing here?"
"I hate it when they're missing stuff in here."
"That's cool! Now can you make his leg twitch?!"
"Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us."
"What do you mean he wasn't in for a sex change..."
"This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?"
"FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!"
"Oh no! Page 47 of the manual is missing!"

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